Irritated and Disenchanted

Today was not that bad. Work wise, I went there and things went as smoothly as they could, no customers caused me to fret neither did my co-workers. Although, I don’t know if I am going through PMS but I am experiencing a myriad of emotions and I really wish I was taking kickboxing because I need some kind of outlet to express what I am feeling.

Like everyone, I am going through a rough patch and honestly the feelings to give up are just increasing. Like seriously God, can ya girl get a break? I feel like I am walking around with a big ass thunder cloud above my head, and being soaked by the rain and hit my bolts of lightning.

Something that’s really bothering me though is my weight loss. I am so pissed to say that I have not lost not one damn pound. I made all these damn changes in my diet, I even included smoothies. waking up after 5 in the morning and forsaking sleep to work out and not one DAMN pound has been lost. I am drinking all this damn water, leaving behind all the chocolate, fried chicken, eating all the damn bush and still not one DAMN pound lost.

My mom, thank heavens for her, keep telling me not to give up but what the hell is wrong with me. I mean, this has made me shed a tear or two. Sometimes the thought pops in my head, girl just EAT and then I go to the kitchen and cannot bring myself to gorge on the food. For instance tonight, I am eating oatmeal when I really want a double down and fries from KFC but no health is wealth or whatever that means….*Side Eye*

Anyways, lemme go finish this oatmeal and go shower and go to bed, maybe in the morning I would feel better.

Good night!

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