As my challenge is now over with no progress to show, I may have allowed myself to just be lazy just a tad……………………………………………………………………………………………………………..
I have not exercising or eating properly and I can say honestly that I have been overeating and today an acquaintance of mine says to me “Mel, not to be rude or nothing but you’ve gained a lot of weight in a small amount of time” Honestly, when she said it I felt nothing but then as usual I began to overthink and now I am still not feeling anything LOL.
She is right though, I have gained a lot of weight but lately my confidence level has been through the roof, yes I want a flat stomach, yes I want my legs and arms smaller but I feel sexy and gorgeous. I am smiling more because I feel great. Sighs, I do have to do something though about my constant hunger and my greediness.
Why couldn’t Jesus allow me to eat whatever I want like some people and gain no weight. It is annoying sometimes to be gaining weight even if I eat like a damn bird and some people eat truckloads of foods and gain nada! SOOOOOO UNFAIR!!!!!! Life is unfair right? Yes it is…well sometimes!
Since the Pure Grenada Music Festival, I have not been singing and that has been a cause for concern for me. I have been on such a high where I am concerned and still being on my quest to totally conquer fear, that I didn’t want to stop singing. I still don’t want to be the “main sing”, I am contented with just doing back ups for now and work my way up but alas, the opportunity has not presented itself as yet. I am praying about it though. The year ain’t over yet!!
I had such big plans for this year but life said uh uh uh and you know what maybe it’s for the best. If anyone truly knows me, knows that I am a planner but we cannot always plan, sometimes we just have to go with the flow and just let some things be.
I am really trying not to beat myself up about the many and I mean MANY things that I am so used to doing. Life is so short and yet most of us live like we have all the time in the world and won’t even take the time to smell the roses. Before we know it, we are 60 and waiting on death. I really do not want that to be me. Carpe diem right?!?!
On another the other hand, I know I must regain my focus if I ought to actual accomplish some things. I have lost focus on my goals, yes my weight and singing and my course- I had an exam yesterday and all I gotta say is thank you Jesus for small mercies. While I loving this carefree kinda attitude, I am not loving the loss of focus, there must be balance.
Anyway guys, that’s all for the update. I sincerely hope all is well and doing things to better yourselves♥
Remember I love you for reading♥